Oklahoma celebrates centennial sooner

CLAREMORE, Okla.: There’s something about a birthday that draws attention, whether it’s a state turning 100, or a man reaching 128. Oklahoma’s been celebrating a Centennial all year, even though they don’t officially reach 100 ’til November 16. Oklahoma has had so much fun with this Centennial I propose they keep on going and celebrate the 101st in the same manner. In fact every state ought to find something to celebrate every year or two.

As for “my” birthday (Nov. 4), I tried to keep it quiet, but they kept announcing it in the papers and on television. The party started Friday morning with the Oologah second graders singing at the old ranch house, then a parade in Claremore Saturday afternoon, and it ended with Garth Brooks in Tulsa. The Pocahontas Club, which the Cherokee girls started in 1899, also held their usual delightful ceremony at the Memorial. All this attention is kind of embarrassing, but I guess I’ll hang around for the next one.

Oklahoma had other excitement this week. They put in force a law against hiring or helping illegal immigrants and it has caused quite a ruckus and legal haggling. But according to the newspapers, the main effect of the new law is that most of ’em have left of their own accord. This last item should be of interest to those in other states who say we can’t possibly deport 12 million people. See, you let the word out you’re serious about illegal immigration, and they kinda deport themselves.

Now I know there’s some good folks among ’em. They work hard and don’t like to be called illegal, even though they jumped the gun instead of waiting in line to be let in legally. In Oklahoma there’s a name for those folks. It’s a peculiar name that goes back 120 years and is still held in ill repute across most of the state (at least among the cowboys). This strange name was stuck on those who illegally jumped the gun weeks ahead of the famous Land Runs. Rather than wait, they sneaked in “Sooner”.

So I propose that all these millions of folks who sneaked into this country illegally be hereafter called Sooners. The ones in New York, when they get their driver’s license they will given a license plate holder for their car that says in red letters, Sooner Schooner. In California there’s so many Oklahoma Sooners that moved there during the Depression these new Sooners will fit right in. Now Texas is different. All illegals will clear out of there pronto, because nobody in Texas will ever admit to being a Sooner.

Historic quotes from Will Rogers:

“There is nothing in the world like home. You can roam all over the World, but after all, it’s what the people at home think of you that really counts.” WA #128, May 24, 1925