Hurrican Gustav Blows Past Hot Air from Dems and GOP

COLUMBUS: Just as the Republicans were ready to blow into St. Paul at the upper end of the Mississippi, Hurricane Gustav decided to “gust” into New Orleans at the other end. (As I’m sending this out Monday morning, the Cat 2 hurricane has reached Louisiana and Mississippi.)

I suggest that both parties call a moratorium on politics until we see the full effects of Gus. Then I further propose that no matter what happens, neither party try to use the hurricane to political advantage. These hurricanes never bother to ask your politics before knocking down your house.

The Democrats finished their convention in Denver, with 85,000 gathered at a football stadium to listen to their nominee. It was a good speech. Mr. Obama rattled of a list of worthy causes, dozens of ’em, that have a hefty price tag attached. Free health care for everyone, free college education for the needy, more and better teachers, money to build up the military, billions for renewable energy and nuclear power. Then he announced he would reduce taxes on 95 percent of Americans. That got wild applause and delegates were dancing in the aisles.

But then I got to feeling sorry for the other 5 percent and missed the rest of the talk. Could I be unfortunate enough to be trapped in that top 5 percent? Regardless, I did some investigating, and found that those folks already pay more than half of all income taxes, so asking them to raise it to three-fourths may not totally destroy their bank accounts or ambition.

Mr. Obama did not mention the top 1 percent, but I’ve got a clue what’s coming for them. Next April they’ll each get a personal phone call from President Obama.

“How much did you make?”

“Mr. President, counting stock sales, a salary bonus, and a small inheritance my wife received, it added up to 2.3 million dollars.”

“That’s wonderful. Send it in.”

Then the President will add, “As a token of appreciation, we’ll send a nice card to your offspring informing them you are now destitute and will be living off them for a while.”

Most of the excitement centered on the Vice-Presidential picks. Senator Joe Biden of Delaware was named by Obama. He’s a fine man, experienced in foreign affairs. He ran for President, got 9000 votes in Iowa and dropped out, causing Senator Clinton to ponder on why she wasted six more months gathering 18 million votes, with nothing to show for it.

Then Mr. McCain reached all the way to Alaska and named Governor Sarah Palin as his V-P. She fits his maverick style, had been mayor of a small town, and it seemed that McCain selected her to appeal to women voters who are good mothers, have competed in beauty pageants and love to hunt moose. That’ll bring in a lot of men voters, too.

Historic quotes from Will Rogers:

“Democrats never agree on anything…, that’s why they’re Democrats. If they agreed with each other, they’d be Republicans.” Saturday Evening Post, May 1, 1926

“This Alaska is a great country. If they can just keep from being taken over by the U. S. they got a great future. There may be some doubt about the Louisiana Purchase being a mistake, but when Seward in ’68 bought Alaska for $7,000,000 he even made up for what we had overpaid the Indians for Manhattan Island.” DT#2815, August 13, 1935