Will makes jokes at Treasuryās expense
COLUMBUS: At a time when the government is ordering big companies to cut back on frivolous expenses, why along comes news that the Treasury Dept, thatās in charge of all this debt weāre racking up, wants to hire a Cartoonist. The whole idea is, to relieve their stress he is supposed to kinda make fun of the workers dealing with this Trillion dollar deficit, and get them to laugh at themselves. You know, to laugh even more than they are currently laughing at the taxpayers for taking on this humongous debt.
Well, a Senator got wind of it (and who knows more about frivolous spending than a Senator), and they canceled the plan. But thereās good news for these forlorn federal money changers. At no cost to the Treasury, every newspaper cartoonist in the country will draw something thatāll remind them to be happy they even have a job. And a few of us who arenāt cartoonists will toss in a humorous jab now and then to help lighten the mood.
Congress and Treasury Secretary Geithner didnāt much care for my plan last week to cover the uninsured. They came out with their own plan: to cover all your medical costs while youāre living, they take everything youāve got left when you die. Itās kinda like the plan drawn up by a Treasury Secretary 74 years ago. (See below)
I canāt finish without writing about Walter Cronkite. I got to meet him a few years ago when he talked at an Ohio Broadcasters convention. I asked him if he knew he was born on the birthday of another legendary American, Will Rogers. He seemed surprised, but Iām guessing he knew and just temporarily forgot it. Mr. Cronkite may have died today at 92, but he wonāt be forgotten, temporarily or otherwise.
Historic quotes by Will Rogers:
(The Secretary of the Treasury Morgenthau) ācame out with a plan to put a bigger and better tax on these big estates: an inheritance tax. On an estate of say $10 million, why the government will take about 90 percent of it, giving the off-spring 10.Ā And on estates of a 100 million, 200 million, a billion, and like that, well, the government just takes all of that and notifies the heirs, āYour father died a pauper here today.Ā And heās being buried by the Millionairesā Emergency Burial Association.ā
Now mind you, I donāt hold any great grief for a man that dies and leaves millions and hundreds of millions and billions.Ā I donāt mean that.Ā But I donāt believe Mr. Morgenthau’s plan will work, because he gives figures in there that shows what this new inheritance tax would bring in every year.Ā He says in 1936 we get so much, in 1938…Ā He give these figures to show what it will bring in every year, that is, as long as the Democrats stay in.
He seems to know just whoās going to die each year.Ā And how much they’re going to leave.Ā Now, brother, that’s planning, aināt it, when you can figure out that!Ā Now suppose, for instance, heās got scheduled to die J. P. Morgan.Ā Heās got him scheduled to die on a certain year.Ā And you can bet, if they can arrange it, theyāll have him die while the Democrats are in, so they can get the benefit of that estate anyhow, see? Now, according to plans, J. P. Morgan has got to die in order for Mr. Morgenthau to reach his quota for that year.Ā Now I think Mr. Morgan is a nice man and his patriotism might compare with some of the rest of us. But whether heād be patriotic enough to want to die on this yearās schedule just to make Morgenthauās budget balance, Iāve got my doubts. Thatās asking a good deal of a man to just die right off just so I can balance my budget.Ā He might be rather unreasonable and not want to do it.Ā I say, old men is contrary.Ā And rich old men is awful contrary.Ā Theyāve had their own way so long…
So in order for Mr. Morgenthauās plan to work out, he’s got to bump these wealthy guys off, or something.Ā Well, now, the governmentās doing everything else, you know, but there is a Humane Society.āĀ Radio, April 28, 1935