Weekly Comments Archive
Archived Issue
Sunday, November 17, 2019
ISSUE #993
Bribery, Impeachment, Billionaires and Millionaires

Did you study Latin in school? No one else has either lately.

Adam Schiff and Nancy Pelosi finally gave up trying to translate Latin to American voters and instead are speaking plain English: “President Trump needs to be impeached because he committed BRIBERY!”

Apparently someone on the House Intel Committee read the Constitution (probably for the first time) and saw that a President can be impeached for “treason, bribery, or other high crimes and misdemeanors.” Nowhere does it say quid pro quo. In case you’re wondering, I’m sure James Madison and Thomas Jefferson knew some Latin, but they were smart enough to keep it out of the Constitution.

Even the word bribery confused a few Congressmen. The writers of the Constitution meant that a President could be impeached if he accepted a bribe to take some official action. The idea of a President bribing a country never came up because in George Washington’s day no president had any excess cash. And neither did Hamilton’s Treasury.

Speaking of excess cash, Elizabeth Warren decided that Billionaires have enough extra cash lying around to pay for all the grandiose plans she has promised. She calculated that she can convince a hundred million voters that all their wants and wishes can be paid for by a few thousand Billionaires.

Clearly, Elizabeth Warren loves Billionaires. Only problem is if she is President for 4 years, there won’t be any Billionaires left. Then to get re-elected in 2024 she will promise that Millionaires can pay for all our wants and wishes.

Now, if that all works out for the Democrats, in 2028 the next bright star, candidate Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, will guarantee that, since we cleaned out all our Billionaires and Millionaires, our four hundred million poor and undernourished citizens and immigrants can live off our surviving Thousandaires.

Historic quotes by Will Rogers:

“Poor Democrats, I love ’em. I guess it’s because some are so dumb. Now they are dying to scare up an issue by trying to discredit Mr. Hoover, because some lobbyist wrote a letter saying that he knew President Hoover’s secretary, and that the secretary was very partial to Cuban sugar in his coffee in the morning, and that in view of this dastardly plot Mr. Hoover should really be impeached. Then they wonder why they don’t get anywhere.” DT #1064, Dec. 23, 1929

“I don’t suppose [there is] the most unemployed or the hungriest man in America [that hasn’t] contributed in some way to the wealth of every millionaire in America.” Radio, Oct. 18, 1931

“And on [accumulated wealth] of say $10  million, why  the  government  will  take  about 90 percent of it. And then on [wealth] of a 100 million, 200 million, a billion, and like that, well, the government just takes all of that.” Radio, April 28, 1935 (Note: Will was talking about estate taxes. I took the liberty of replacing estate with wealth.)


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