Weekly Comments Archive
Archived Issue
Monday, February 18, 2019
ISSUE #962
Honoring our Presidents, and finding Amazon Prime Land.

This is Presidents Day. We used to have Lincoln’s Birthday and Washington’s Birthday, but Congress decided to lump them and all the other Presidents into one holiday, and celebrate it on a Monday.

So today honors all 45 Presidents. I am concerned about some folks. When they find out this includes Donald Trump, why, they may get so upset they’ll refuse to buy a new mattress at half off.

Here are a few remarks by Will Rogers about our Presidents:

          “There wasn’t any Republicans in Washington’s day. No Republicans, no Boll Weevil, no income tax, no cover charge, no disarmament conference, no luncheon clubs, no stop lights, no static (radio), no head winds. My Lord, living in those days, who wouldn’t be great?”

“You know Lincoln’s famous remark about ‘God must have loved the common people, because he made so many of them?’ Well, you are not going to get people’s votes nowadays by calling ’em common. Lincoln might have said it, but I bet it was not until after he was elected.”

“Coolidge made less speeches and got more votes than any man that ever run.”

“I always did want to see [Herbert Hoover] elected.  I wanted to see how far a competent man could go in politics.  It has never been tried before.” 

          “(Franklin) Roosevelt wants recovery to start at the bottom. In other words, by a system of high taxes, he wants business to help the little fellow to get started and get some work, and then pay business back by buying things when he’s at work. Business says, ‘Let everybody alone. Let business alone.’”

Since Amazon was booted from a rundown area of New York City before they could put a shovel in the ground, I have two great locations for their consideration. One is in the middle of West Virginia and I will start by offering a couple hundred acres. Instead of tagging on to a big city where Amazon would be a bit player, I suggest they build their own city. Don’t laugh; Australia and Brazil both built new Capital cities, and Amazon has more cash than either of those governments. And look what Walt Disney did for Orlando and Sam Walton for Bentonville. They can call their new city “Amazonia.”

In West Virginia, the location would be among beautiful rolling hills, convenient to the towns of Weston, Buckhannon and Clarksburg, with I-79 running north-south, another 4-lane highway direct to Washington, DC (if it ever gets finished), dams for water supply and recreation, abundant natural gas and timber, and nearby colleges. And I’m sure WVU would build a new branch campus at Jackson’s Mill.

The second location is in Oklahoma, between Claremore and Oologah. (Tulsa is a suburb of both.)  I don’t have much land to offer personally (thanks to the Dawes Commission), but the local Congressman, state officials and the Cherokee Nation would help round up far more than you could ever get in DC or NYC. The land is less hilly than West Virginia. This site has a lake, Interstate highway, natural gas, and railroads going in every direction. And casinos! We have coal, but if you prefer electricity from a renewable source, you’ve probably heard that our wind comes sweepin’down the plain. Constantly.

So, Jeff Bezos, it’s your choice. The wide open spaces of West Virginia or Oklahoma. You can’t seriously consider Al Capone’s Chicago, can you? And, yes, Nashville is nice, but you need to know that most of the best country singers and guitar pickers originated in Oklahoma. And plenty are from West Virginia.

Historic quote by Will Rogers:

“Claremore, Oklahoma, is a town in physical size, but a city at heart. It’s the home of Radium water, where you can take those wonderful baths that cure you of practically everything; everything but being a Democrat.” WA #153, Nov. 15, 1925


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