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Archived Issue
Sunday, January 5, 2014
ISSUE #785
Optimism rules, except in Antarctica and New York City

#785   Jan. 5, 2014

I read where Mr. Bernanke is optimistic that the economy will continue improving in 2014. But he’s leaving the Federal Reserve, so I doubt anyone will listen to him. Janet Yellen will replace him, and she says she is going to attack global warming and, I guess, let the economy take care of itself.
Dr. Yellen might change her tune when she hears about the ship loaded with global warming scientists that went to Antarctica to show the world how warm it has gotten. Instead of basking in the warm ocean waters, the boat got blocked in by solid ice. They called in icebreakers, three of ‘em, and two of them got stuck, too. Finally a helicopter went in and hauled out the scientists. But their boat and the icebreakers are locked in there, maybe until Yellen and the scientists figure out how to melt the ice.
We’ve had two or three trains that derailed carrying crude oil from Canada, resulting in fires and several deaths. I saw a television news broadcaster kinda pleading, “Why can’t we come up with another way to transport oil?”
The New York Times announced two major findings. First, the killing of our Ambassador and three others in Benghazi, Libya, on Sept. 11, 2012, was because an anti-Muslim video really upset a handful of peace-loving Libyans. (They did not indicate whether President Obama or Secretary Clinton should have removed all personnel from Benghazi weeks before the spontaneous attack.)  Second, Eric Snowden’s leaks should go unpunished, even though they cost us a hundred million dollars and set back our national security twenty years. Snowden claims he is a whistleblower, but a true whistleblower is one who sees that something is wrong and notifies his superiors, not a traitor who shares a whole boatload of national secrets with an enemy.
I’ll have to dig up some old issues of the New York Times to see if they supported the humanitarian efforts of John Dillinger, Al Capone and the Dalton Gang.
President Obama returned to Washington with his two daughters. I read that he let the First Lady stay another week or two as a special birthday present. I’ve got to wonder how much his ‘gift’ will cost the rest of us. But I bet she’ll order up an immediate first class return trip on Air Force One if she gets wind that a surprise trip to D.C. is planned by a certain Danish Prime Minister. Actually I hope she enjoys celebrating her 50th birthday in Hawaii. There’s about a hundred million of us in frigid sections of the mainland that would love to go help her blow out the candles.
New York City elected a new mayor, Bill DeBlasio. He says he wants to get rid of income inequality. He didn’t say precisely whether he wants the rich to move out of town, or for poor immigrants to go away. Either way would do it. Look at Detroit.
DeBlasio also wants to rid the city of horses. The horse-drawn carriages that tourists love to ride in Central Park will be replaced by electric carts. Yep, that’s sure to attract more tourists.

Historic quotes by Will Rogers:
“With New Year’s comes predictions of our leading men. This year they will read as follows, all of them: ‘I am an optimist, and always have been, but we must be assured of no inflation and a fair return on our investment. If the government will just lay off us everything will be fine.’ Now watch and see how far this misses it.”
 DT #2618, Dec. 26, 1934
 “A man that don’t love a horse, there’s something the matter with him. If he has no sympathy for the man that does love horses then there is something worse the matter with him.”   

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