Federal government agencies have no sense of humor. We already knew the IRS, TSA, and FBI don’t like jokes. Now the Federal Highway Administration has joined in.
The Highway Administration is planning to ban any humorous messages on the electronic information signs you often see over 4-lane roads. They only want bad news posted, such as “Crash ahead 4 miles. Expect 90-minute delay.” If there’s no bad news, the signs will probably be blank. Anything funny won’t be allowed, such as “Visiting in-laws? Slow down, get there late.”
Do you remember the Burma-Shave signs? They added humor to otherwise boring road trips, printed on five consecutive signs. Here are two: “SAID FARMER BROWN. WHO’S BALD ON TOP. WISH I COULD. ROTATE THE CROP. Burma-Shave.” “SPRING HAS SPRUNG. THE GRASS HAS RIZ. WHERE LAST YEAR’S. CARELESS DRIVER IS. Burma-Shave.”
This federal ban on funny lines will be described in a 1000-page manual. It will have one page of acceptable messages and 999 pages listing banned messages.
The government is giving us two more years to enjoy the humor. It’ll take that long for officials to read the whole book. And it gives the joke writers time to practice for a new career entertaining in comedy clubs.
This is no laughing matter. Why is President Biden scared of Iran? Iran has attacked our soldiers in Iraq and Syria over a hundred times. Iran surrogates are firing rockets at ships in the Red Sea. Iran-backed terrorists in Lebanon continue to threaten northern Israel. Of course, Iran funded and trained the Hamas terrorists for the October 7 attack on Israel. Why is President Biden reluctant to take any meaningful action against Iran or any of the terrorists doing their dirty work? Is he blind to the hatred that Iran’s leaders hold for the U.S., Israel, and other allies? Not only is Biden refusing to take any meaningful action, he is insisting that Israel stop fighting Hamas and give them a recognized nation of Palestine to rule over.
Appeasing Iran by giving their radical leaders billions of dollars and allowing them to sell oil to get even more money makes no sense. And now Iran is completing their goal of having a nuclear weapon.
Iran leaders (as separate from the average Iranian) are like rattlesnakes. A friend sent me a story about a West Texas rancher who described his treatment of rattlesnakes, “I do not try to reason with a rattlesnake or have a ‘meaningful dialogue’ with it. I just kill it. I do not try to get to know the rattlesnake better so I can find a way to live with the rattlesnakes and convince them not to bite me. I just kill them.”
To most Americans, Iran is a rattlesnake. To President Biden, Iran is a garter snake. And that’s no joke.
The National Football League has narrowed the playoff teams down to four. Next Sunday, Kansas City plays at Baltimore, and Detroit plays at San Francisco. These teams showed they can win in January weather (except Detroit, which has a dome). The winners will meet in the Super Bowl on Feb. 11.
Historic quote by Will Rogers:
“[Men in government] can do more funny things naturally than I can think of to do purposely.” WA #57, Jan. 13, 1924
I appreciate replies to my Weekly Comments. Last week I received several compliments about Howard Buffett. Also, a comment about President Biden, “General George Washington crossed the Delaware and won our independence from Britain. And Delaware gave us a Senator Biden who quashed our independence and sold himself and us to China.”