Weekly Comments Archive
Archived Issue
Thursday, March 4, 2004
ISSUE #312
Weekly Comments: Will helps Senator Edwards find work

# 312, March 4, 2004

COLUMBUS: The Democratic horse race ended early. Senator Kerry crossed the finish line Tuesday night and Senator Edwards and the rest of the field were left hobbling along on the back stretch.

Mr. Edwards officially dropped out yesterday, sending my Insurance friends into action. They don’t want to risk having an idle trial lawyer laying around looking for a lawsuit. So half of them are working on Kerry to name Edwards as his vice-president, and the other half are lobbying President Bush to open a cabinet spot for him if he’s re-elected.

I guess Mr. Edwards could make a fine Agriculture Secretary, in case Ann Veneman decides to move back to California. He is strong on optimism, and nobody has more optimism than a farmer. Sometimes that’s all he has, is optimism. John has been campaigning about “Two Americas”, and the farmers agree. One percent of America is raising the food, the other 99 percent are eatin’ it, and the farmers say they could use a hand once in a while.

The Kerry-Bush campaign has heated up already, and there’s eight months to go. Republicans started running television ads today, and five minutes later the Democrats started bashing them. They don’t have any of their own, and couldn’t afford to run ’em if they did, so they kinda keep it even by arguing over what the other side shows.

By the way, Dennis Kucinich has not given up. I think he’s holding out hope to be vice-president, on the Nader ticket.

Historic quote from Will Rogers:

“Politics has got so expensive that it takes lots of money to even get beat with nowadays.” DT #1538, June 28, 1931

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