Month: January 2012

COLUMBUS: The President delivered his State of the Union speech. Instead of talking about the state of the economy after three years in office, he emphasized his fairness doctrine for millionaires. With a deficit of $1.5 Trillion he wants anyone making over a million dollars to send 30% of it to Washington to balance the budget.

Sounds reasonable, but I heard Congressman Paul Ryan say that collecting 30% from those folks would only knock 8% off the deficit.

So if the President is serious, he had better go for 90 or 100% from the millionaires and 30% from everybody else. The half at the bottom that don’t pay any income taxes will holler, even if asked to contribute 5%, but it would help offset the cost of food stamps and school lunches.

The President introduced Warren Buffett’s secretary, saying the several thousands of dollars she paid last year was unfair compared to the millions her boss paid. I was wondering, did she fly commercial from Omaha, or did he send Air Force One to pick her up?

I bet if you confiscated half the wealth of the top 10% and spread it among the bottom 20%, in ten years the top folks would have rebuilt theirs, and the others would have squandered most of it.  Now, don’t tell the President or he may propose it. He would take credit for the first part, and be long gone before the ten years was up.

When the President flew to Arizona to campaign, Governor Jan Brewer met him at the airport. I don’t know what he said to her, but he was definitely not singing, “I’m… so in love with you.”

While the President favors jazz, Newt’s personal theme song is a country classic, “Please, release me, let me go.”

If you think I’m being a bit harsh on our President, it’s just my feeble attempt to balance the discussion. See, Romney and Gingrich are beating on each other so much I don’t feel obliged to add to the Republican misery.

Historic quotes by Will Rogers:

“A conservative is a man who has plenty of money and doesn’t see any reason why he shouldn’t always have plenty of money. A Democrat is a fellow who never had any, but doesn’t see any reason why he shouldn’t have some.” WA #535, March 26, 1933

“When our country does accidentally stumble on a competent man why don’t they let him alone?” DT #200,  March 17, 1927

Jan. 22, 2012

COLUMBUS: South Carolina muddied the water for the Republicans. It took about two seconds after the polls closed for them to announce the winner; in Iowa it took two weeks.
The Republicans are down to four candidates, the same four who got the most votes in the National No-Till Primary in St. Louis. In that primary, Newt announced that voters should be glad he had three wives instead of just one because a President must be good at Multi-Tasking.
So Santorum, Romney, Gingrich and Ron Paul are in a horse race as they gallop around Florida for a week. If Congressman Paul wins they will each have a victory to brag about to their contributors.
Gov. Romney finally agreed to release his income tax returns on Tuesday. We’ll learn that he made millions, donated a big chunk of it to charities, and paid a few million in taxes but not enough to satisfy a lot of people who made a little and paid nothing. Mitt is shrewd to release them just before the State of the Union address because the news will end up on the back page.
President Obama has been traveling the country gathering material for his speech Tuesday night. He spent a couple of weeks scouring the beaches of Hawaii for gems of information, visited Disney World to pick up some Mickey Mouse ideas, ate with bankers and Wall Streeters in New York City, announced some appointments in Cleveland, and stopped in Chicago to refine his message on ethics in government.
The President has pointed with pride to the 2.7 million people working on green energy. Since he is shutting down coal-fired power plants and refusing to drill for oil or pipe it in from Canada, he had better offer a plan for the government to hire about 10 million more and put them on treadmills for 8 hours a day so they can generate electricity to make up the difference. Once the folks drawing unemployment checks get wind that those are the only jobs available they will be dropping off the unemployment list even faster than they have been recently.
He will propose a plan to give more opportunities to the middle class. From now on, he will hire only those who have never earned more than $100,000 a year to Cabinet posts and various management positions in Washington. I suggest he start with EPA, Treasury, Attorney General, and the Federal Reserve.
He says he wants to promote fairness by having millionaires contribute more to the economy. Well, he should name those he feels should give up  another million dollars a year, including brokers, famous athletes, movie stars and politicians, and require them to hire 50 downtrodden families, put them to work and pay them directly. That way the money will go straight to those who need it instead of getting filtered out as it passes through Washington.
Joe Paterno died today, just a few weeks after his football coaching career ended at Penn State. It pains me to recognize his greatness because my home school, West Virginia University, contributed more wins toward his total of 409 than any other school. His death reminded me of another famous coach, Bear Bryant, who died shortly after retiring from Alabama.
The Super Bowl will be the championship of the Northeast, the New York Giants against the New England Patriots.  It seems a shame to make them go all the way to Indianapolis to play the game.  There will be a Manning at quarterback but the Harbaugh family got shut out.

Historic quote by Will Rogers:
“One of the few stipulated duties of the President is that every once in awhile he delivers a message to Congress to tell them the “Condition of the Country.” This message as I say is to Congress; the rest of the country knows the condition of the country, for they live in it.  But the Senators and Congressmen being in Washington all the time have no idea what is going on in America.  So the President has to tell ’em.”  WA #371, Feb. 2, 1930

COLUMBUS: Some folks have poked fun at our Presidential Primary conducted Friday, but let me tell you, we’ve got clout. New Hampshire brags that their primary narrows the field, but six Republican candidates went into New Hampshire, and six came out alive and smiling. But a last place finish in the National No-Till Primary knocked out Jon Huntsman. Yes, he placed third in New Hampshire and he has ten million dollars of his dad’s money to finance a campaign. But today he decided drop out, go back to Utah and talk to his dad. Even after tithing, he should have nine million in the bank. So, you ask, who won? Former Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum won and his friend Newt Gingrich finished second. Third was Ron Paul and the favorite, Mitt Romney, dropped to fourth. Rick Perry was fifth, leaving Huntsman sixth. While our 900 farmers were selecting Santorum, 150 evangelical preachers and other conservatives gathered in Texas to decide on their favorite. They argued all day, voted three times, and passed the collection plate twice before agreeing on Santorum. The farmers gathered in Missouri and needed only twenty minutes and one vote. And no money changed hands. You’ve heard all weekend about those 150 evangelicals, but I contend that 900 farmers have more clout. Both groups took the decision serious, but the farmers had more fun. If Santorum does well in South Carolina and Florida, you just watch, those preachers will claim they did it. But you, my loyal readers, will know who really deserves the credit. The cruise ship that crashed into an island off the coast of Italy was apparently being steered by a man who was hired as a waiter ten years ago. Because he was so good at charming passengers he  rose to captain and was put in charge of the biggest and most important ship in the fleet. Is that any way to run a cruise line? Standards & Poors announced they will drop the credit rating for half of Europe because they continue to run up massive debt. France, Italy, Greece and other countries have been warned to cut back on spending, but the folks making the financial decisions for these governments are living off the spending. Rather than cut spending, they would rather go down with the ship. Tim Tebow and the Denver Broncos kinda crashed this weekend. So did Aaron Rodgers and the Green Bay Packers, and Drew Brees and New Orleans Saints, but nobody will be asking if either of those two quarterbacks knows how to throw a pass. Historic quotes by Will Rogers: “I have always wanted to see Henry Ford elected President. Compared to the business he runs, our Government affairs would be a kind of branch office for him. When Congress got to stalling, he would go around and lift up the hood of the House or Senate to see what was the matter with it.” Radio broadcast, June 1, 1930

COLUMBUS: Mitt Romney squeezed out a victory in Iowa.  I told you someone would surge at the last second but Rick Santorum was still 8 votes short at the buzzer.
Governor Romney will also win in New Hampshire. In South Carolina, whatever candidates are left may gang up and try to shoot out the tires of the Romney bandwagon.
Now there is one extra stop for those folks, sort of, before South Carolina. This week I’ll be in St. Louis for the National No-Till Farmers annual conference and it’s become a tradition every four years to conduct a Presidential Primary election.  It will be on Friday the Thirteenth so Lord knows what calamity is likely to befall the winner.  It’s all in fun, and if any of the candidates show up they are welcome to replace their stand-ins.
Texan Rick Perry may have an advantage with this gang because he is a farmer.  But Ron Paul will counter with a plan to make these farmers rich; he plans to legalize marijuana.  Just think, if folks are making a living today growing that stuff in a basement, a farmer with a thousand acres can make a fortune. Besides the usual Republican candidates, I’m expecting a few others to show up, including Donald Trump, and even Hillary Clinton and one of Herman Cain’s old girlfriends.
I’ll report the results next week, in case you don’t hear ‘em sooner on Fox News.

“Laughing our cares away” was the front page headline in the USA Today on  Friday. The story said that comedy is more popular today because times are tough and people need to laugh. Well, I’m not surprised; it was the same during the Depression. This country’s got plenty of good humorists and comedians and we are all eager to give you something to laugh at.

Historic quotes by Will Rogers:
“Democrats take the whole thing as a joke. Republicans take it serious but run it like a joke.”
“A conservative is a man who has plenty of money and doesn’t see any reason why he shouldn’t always have plenty of money. A Democrat is a fellow who never had any, but doesn’t see any reason why he shouldn’t have some.”
“Republicans want a man that can lend dignity to the office. Democrats want a man that will lend some money.”
“Everybody nowadays is suggesting ways of getting prosperous on somebody else’s money.”
“Newspaper headline says: “Congress is deadlocked and can’t act.” I think that is the greatest blessing that could befall this country.”
“The short memories of American voters is what keeps our politicians in office.”
“Once a man wants to hold a Public Office, he is absolutely no good for honest work.”
“There’s no trick to being a humorist when you’ve got the whole government working for you.”

Jan. 1, 2012

COLUMBUS: The campaign in Iowa is coming down to the last minute. The going rate for a vote is around $100; that’s about what the Republican candidates will spend in total. The only prediction I’ll make is this: the Democratic Caucus will be won by Barrack Obama.

For the Republicans, Governor Romney could win Iowa and then sweep the primaries, but I’ve got my doubts. One thing about Mitt; the more candidates there are in the primaries, the more he likes it.

Virginia is having second thoughts about limiting their Presidential primary to only two candidates. These Republicans are spending a pile of money on their national campaigns, and Virginia wants their share. Instead of requiring 10,000 Virginians to sign a petition for a candidate, the Virginia governor (after consulting with the Tourism Board) said, “Any candidate who promises to spend a half a million dollars in Virginia should be on the ballot.”

President Obama is relaxing on a beach in Hawaii complaining that Congress is doing nothing. He didn’t say whether it was the Republicans in the House or the Senate Democrats he was upset with.  Of course a lot of the folks he is complaining about are also vacationing.

The President wants Congress to raise the debt ceiling. Didn’t they do that in August? Did I miss something? I thought they agreed to cut expenses so we could stop borrowing. As fast as the debt ceiling is being raised, in a year or two you’ll need a telescope to see it.

With shoppers doing so much Christmas buying on credit, the government isn’t the only one raising their debt ceiling.

Remember that two-month reduction in Social Security tax payments? If you’re celebrating because you get to keep an extra $400 or so in January and February, you had better not plan to buy a house in the next 10 years. If you do, and the mortgage is with Fannie or Freddie for $200,000, that reduction will end up costing you about $4000.

I read that in Oregon and Washington, the electric company is working on a plan to store excess energy produced by wind machines for later use when the wind dies down.  Now, where that plan would really pay off is Washington, DC.  Congress spews out enough excess wind, they could heat the whole town.

Historic quotes by Will Rogers:
“I told you not to be too optimistic about the Senate… We pay for wisdom, and we get wind.” DT # 574, May 29, 1928

 “Did you read all the New Year’s optimism by all our leading men and bankers? Same gang every year. Every one either a millionaire or an officeholder… Looks like just for the novelty one newspaper would print what some poor man saw in store for the coming year.” DT# 448, Jan. 2, 1928