Category: Uncategorized

While I was in Washington last week I stopped in the “old joke factory” to see what Congress is up to. Mainly I went up on Capitol Hill to visit “my” Oklahoma Congressman Markwayne Mullin. His office is in the Longworth House Office Bldg, named after an old friend, Speaker of the House from Ohio, Nicholas Longworth. After chatting about ten minutes he said, “I’ve got to go cast a vote. Come with me and we’ll take some photos in front of your statue.” Now I ain’t braggin’, but I bet there’s not a one of you that ever had your Congressman offer to pose for a picture in front of your statue.

At the start of the tunnel leading to the Capitol I had to go through security. Those guards do a fine job protecting the Capitol because I had to empty my pockets just like at the airport. Congressman Mullin carried my saddle bags and lasso because he wasn’t sure if they would be allowed in there for a visitor, even one with a statue, but they trust a Congressman.  Striding through that long tunnel he looked right at home with saddle bags slung over his shoulder with a lasso hanging down, because he’s a rancher. He also runs a plumbing company but I won’t get into that. But I can see where plumbing tools could come in handy in Congress, especially when a bill gets clogged up with too many crappy amendments.

Well, we got to the entrance to the House, and right there, keeping an eye on Congress, is “my” statue. One of his assistants, Liz, shot a few photos of us, and he said “So long,” and went in to vote. Liz helped me find my way out. We went through the big rotunda under the dome, and she said it would be closed soon because of construction. You’ve all seen the scaffolding surrounding the dome on the outside; now they are ready to start work on the underside of the dome.

Meanwhile, Secretary Kerry was telling the Senate about the Iran nuclear deal he negotiated. He likes it, President Obama likes it, Iran’s Ayatollah Khamenei likes it. Also Russia, Hezbollah, and the UN. But Israel, Saudi Arabia, Jordan, Egypt, and average Americans don’t trust Iran with a nuclear bomb. We don’t even trust ‘em with a bazooka.

Do you know Donald Trump is running for President? Of course, it’s all over the news, and I mean all over it. There’s 15 other Republican candidates who are lucky to get 5 seconds of air time. Trump was in Laredo, Texas, facing off against Mexico. Next week, August 6, he’ll be in Cleveland facing off against 9 of those other candidates. What a show! Even Hillary will tune in.

President Obama continues to insist the Gitmo prison needs to be closed because it is costing far too much taxpayer money to house a few Islamic terrorists. Meanwhile, he is on a 2-day trip to visit his relatives and leaders in Kenya, costing us taxpayers $1,000,000,000. Wouldn’t it be more sensible to fly a thousand Kenyans to Washington for 2 days? Bring a few Ethiopians, too.

Historic quotes by Will Rogers:

“A diplomat is a man who tells you what he don’t believe himself, and the man he is telling it to don’t believe it any more than he does.” Saturday Evening Post, June 9, 1928

“During this hot weather I don’t want the blame of settling anything wrong… Heat and reason don’t go together. There’s going to be a lot of spouting from the radio and from the speakers’ platforms all this summer. There’ll be more perspiration than common sense flowing.” Radio, June 9, 1935

“What this country needs is more working men and fewer politicians.” WA #95, Oct. 5, 1924

In South Carolina, a state where they practice forgiveness and grace instead of rioting and looting, the Confederate flag was removed from the state capitol grounds and taken to a museum. TV and radio commentators are speculating this will end the murders of innocent black people, but only if all vestiges of Confederate generals and other Southern heroes are also removed.

Congresswoman Pelosi of San Francisco says no state flag that includes even a hint of that Confederate emblem should be allowed in the U.S. Capitol. In response the Governor of one of those states replied: We’ll work on cleaning up our flag; meanwhile you concentrate on cleaning up the sanctuary city mess in your hometown that let an innocent woman be killed by an illegal Mexican felon who had been deported five times.

Now that the flag is down, serious people are asking: Will this create jobs and solve the unemployment problem? Will our schools improve so students learn better and faster?

Speaking of removing objectionable symbols, the Oklahoma Supreme Court wants to tear down the Ten Commandments monument on the capitol grounds in Oklahoma City. Before they take a sledgehammer to it, those justices need to go back and read what Oklahoma’s favorite son, Will Rogers, wrote, “Whoever wrote the Ten Commandments made ‘em short. They may not always be kept but they are understood. They are the same for all.” Later he joked, “When Congress gets the Constitution all fixed up, they are going to start on the Ten Commandments, just as soon as they can find somebody in Washington who has read them.” Governor Fallin stepped in front of the monument and said, “No, this monument will stand.” In fact, she will request that every worker, every legislator, every judge, every lobbyist stop and read all Ten of the Commandments before entering the Capitol. Why, a bunch of those old lawyers will do well to pass 7 out of 10.

President Obama will be visiting Oklahoma. I wonder if he’ll talk to the family of the popular sportscaster who was killed by an illegal immigrant who made an illegal U-turn. I doubt it because he didn’t call the father of the young woman killed in San Francisco either. Some lives don’t matter as much as others.

Last Sunday Greece voted against austerity. Today in the standoff with Europe, Greece is about to get hit with a double dose of austerity. Europe says, if you want any more money you must cut government spending, increase taxes, and “sell some assets.” They already rejected my idea to sell a few Greek Isles. So I suggest they auction off some Greek ruins, including the Parthenon. That should bring in a couple of billion Euros. See, in Greece, ruins are worth more than things that aren’t ruined. On taxes, Greece needs to get tough on wealthy tax evaders to bring in more dough. (Maybe they can hire Lois Lerner to go after ‘em.) Europe knows they can’t cut off Greece entirely because young people would riot and some old ones might starve. So they will loan ‘em a few more Euros, and trust the Greek politicians to follow through with their austerity promises.

Historic quotes by Will Rogers: (on collecting debts from nations)

“(Editorials are saying) ‘What are you going to do? You can’t collect, we have to make some different terms.’ (I say) One message of three words will make every nation dig it up and send it over by plane: Pay or default. There is not a country in the world that would dare default. It would spoil their credit. They couldn’t borrow any money anymore.” DT #1962, Nov. 17, 1932

Secretary of State John Kerry is still negotiating with Iran. They were supposed to reach a deal June 30, but they delayed it another week. They seem to be getting closer. Yes, closer to us agreeing to all of Iran’s demands. Kerry (and Secretary Clinton before him) should have said, “We’re holding back $130 Billion of your money and refusing to let you sell any oil. We’re going to keep these sanctions until you do two things: quit supporting our enemies in the Middle East, and stop development of nuclear bombs and long-range rockets.” But he won’t. Our only hope is for Congress to block any Iran deal until February 2017.

We’ve got a whole slew of Republicans announcing for President. Bobby Jindal, Chris Christy, Donald Trump. And Ohio Governor John Kasich will announce in a couple of weeks.

But the candidate drawing the big crowds is Senator Bernie Sanders. I’ve been reading about his platform. You know, it’s easy to draw a crowd when your main audience includes everyone who is not working and 40 million on food stamps. They sincerely believe his message that taking 90% of everything the top 1% make will cover all their needs and wants. Want a free college education? Got it. Want free hospital stays? Covered.  Free food? Yes, all you care to eat at the Government Buffet.

Based on Senator Sanders’ campaign, I think he is better suited to be president of Greece.  The voters in Greece agreed with their current leader and said, “No, we will not pay Europe the $250 Billion we owe ‘em, and we expect Europe to give us more so we can live this lazy lifestyle we’ve grown accustomed to.”

This is not a new problem. In May 2010, here is a bit of what I wrote in Weekly Comments. “The problem in Greece? The government overspent and overpromised. Greeks are guaranteed a high retirement income, and they live a long, long time after they retire. The government’s been operating on borrowed money, and the younger folks aren’t thrilled at the prospect of paying off the debt and getting none of the benefits.” A year later in July 2011 I wrote, “Leaders in Greece say they have a debt crisis, but it’s actually a work crisis. Nobody wants to work. They’d rather protest, carry signs, throw rocks, and set fires. Greece needs to sell off a few islands. Those Greek Isles are so popular, you’d be surprised what they’d bring at auction.”

If Secretary Kerry were in charge of the financial negotiations with Greece he would likely agree to write off the $250 Billion debt and give ‘em $10 Billion more so they can all take their annual 7-week summer vacations.

The U.S. women’s soccer team won the World Cup, 5-2 over Japan. They got off to a great start scoring 4 goals in the first 16 minutes. Carli Lloyd had 3 of the goals. She and her teammates should be hired to teach our men’s team how to score.

I’m glad you survived our Independence Day celebrations. Chicago had at least 18 murders and almost a hundred who were shot but survived. But I never heard about any of these shootings on national news, probably because none of them were by a white policeman.

Historic quotes by Will Rogers:

“Greece is frying in her own fat.” DT #2683, Mar. 12, 1935

“That liberty we got [in 1776] was a great thing, but they ought to pass a law that we could only celebrate it every 100 years, for at the rate of accidents yesterday we won’t have enough people to celebrate it every year…What this country needs on July the Fourth is not ‘more liberty or more freedom,’ it’s a Roman candle that only shoots out of one end.”  DT #2782, July 5, 1935

President Obama was right. Two weeks ago I said the Obamacare issue the Supreme Court was pondering had already been decided by a vote of 1 to 0. And instead of asking an eighth grader if the words “state” and “federal” mean the same thing, the Justices decided among themselves that, yes, state means federal.

Three years ago you may remember the same old Justices decided that the “penalties” for not signing up for the Affordable Care Act were really “taxes.” The only problem is that Congress would not have passed the ACA if it included “taxes” and if the federal government decided who gets subsidies instead of individual states.

But for all its warts, bumps and bruises I’m happy for the ones who could not get insurance previously. I know one who had a $100,000 hospital bill covered mainly by the taxpayers that otherwise would have come out of her meager bank account. I hope the ACA proves to be affordable for individuals as well as the American taxpayer.

Next the Supreme Court ruled 5 to 4 that people who are gay can get married the same as anyone else. You may have noticed that this decision upset a lot of folks, especially ones who follow the Bible. Of course, this is not the first thing ever legalized that goes against teachings in the Bible. Did you happen to notice how happy, even ecstatic, these prospective newlyweds are? As long as it makes them happy and doesn’t do any harm, go for it. I read a headline that the wedding industry will get a major economic boost. Yes, followed shortly by a boost for divorce lawyers.

I wonder where Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner fits into this situation. Actually my main question is how can a 65-year old man be transformed into a woman who’s only 45?

In Charleston, South Carolina, 9 members of a historic African Methodist Episcopal Church were gunned down by a 21-year old dropout inspired by the devil. And the surviving church members and family members forgave him. Yes, they forgave a mass murderer. Most of the media were astounded because they expected to cover a riot like in Baltimore, Ferguson and New York City. With no riots to excite their audience, they decided to jump on the Confederate flag.

Now I’m not here to defend the Confederate flag. But when folks demand we denounce anyone who fought for the South, remove all recognition of their heroes, and outlaw Gone with the Wind and Dukes of Hazzard, that’s going too far. At the end of the Civil War did President Lincoln imprison all surviving Confederate soldiers and execute the Generals and political leaders? No. He told ‘em to take their mules and rifles and go home and plant their crops. The war is over.

Historic quotes by Will Rogers:

            “Us ignorant people laugh at [religious people], but when they die they go mighty peaceful and happy, which after all, about all there is to living is to go away satisfied.” DT #1232, July 7, 1930

            “The Bible has always been the best seller… I don’t suppose there is two preachers in the world that would absolutely interpret a whole chapter exactly alike. But any interpretation you put on it is good.” WA #586, March 18, 1934

The Supreme Court is winding down with some big decisions coming up. Concerning the issue of a phrase in the Health Care Act that says “subsidies shall flow through exchanges established by the state,” we already have the decision: Obamacare will stand as is because the word “state” means “federal government.” That is the unanimous decision announced by… President Obama. He says that by a 1-0 vote, the Supreme Court is preempted from deciding for itself whether the law is constitutional.

You may remember that the law passed by Congress five years ago was written by an economist (not a lawyer), who stated clearly that the phrase “established by the state” was intentional to keep the feds out of the subsidy business.

Since the whole decision boils down to whether “state” really means “state”, or does it also mean “federal”, I suggest the Supreme Court turn the decision over to a group of eighth graders.  They might treat it like a spelling bee and ask, what’s the meaning of “state?” Then, what’s the meaning of “federal?” It would take ‘em only a minute, without any prompting by lawyers.

Meanwhile the folks who run the University of California at Berkeley are trying to eliminate a few phrases they consider insensitive. A new policy restricts what professors and students can say to each other. At the top of the list of banned statements are these: “I believe the most qualified person should get the job,”  “Everyone can succeed if they work hard enough”, and “America is the land of opportunity.”

Now I take that last one kinda personal because back in 1931 I proudly said, “America is the land of opportunity and don’t ever forget it.” The president of the university seems to think that foreign students are catastrophically offended at the idea of looking for opportunities in America.  Well, I’ve got news for her. Any student whose family is paying almost $60,000 a year to send him or her to Cal for an education, already knows this is the land of opportunity.

Here are a few other things I wrote back then that would be outlawed. “This country is not where it is today on account of any one man. It is here on account of the real common sense of the Big Normal Majority.”  “Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.” “(A successful outcome) shows what hard work, perseverance and taking advantage of your opportunities will do for you.” “Every man gets an opportunity once in a lifetime.” 

If the University of California insists on removing any praise for America from its curriculum, then I suggest the students go over to Palo Alto and enroll at Stanford.

Historic quote by Will Rogers:

       “The minute you read something and you can’t understand it you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer. Then if you give it to another lawyer to read and he don’t know just what it means, why then you can be sure it was drawn up by a lawyer. If it’s in a few words and is plain and understandable only one way, it was written by a non-lawyer.” WA #657, July 28, 1935

The recent economic news out of Washington was disturbing. The government announced what most people already suspected, that the U.S. economy went backwards in the first three months of 2015. The Gross Domestic Product lost ground. The President responded to the bad news, saying that declines in winter are not a surprise because for the last ten or so years our winters have been colder with more snow. Naturally, caused by global warming.

In my previous Weekly Comments (May 17), I asked: is the economy recovering? It was answered last week, kind of, in an official poll. Only 40 percent of Americans feel the recession is over. That’s all. However, most economists and the Federal Reserve say the other 60 percent are wrong and that we have gained steadily since the snow melted. Good times are ahead. We’ve heard optimistic opinions before, and I sure hope these economists are right.

All the Republican candidates for President were in Oklahoma recently. That kept the Governor busy for a few days, but they have all cleared out by now. I rather doubt that any of ‘em will be back before the election, even the nominee. Probably no Democrat candidates either.

Gov. Fallin has been dealing with floods; a month ago it was severe drought, but drought has disappeared from the state. Same for Texas. Meanwhile, California is wondering, what’s the Lord got against us? Last winter most of the snow that rightfully belongs to California wound up in Boston. And now, when Texas and Oklahoma would have gladly given half their rain to California, they got none.

I’ll be in Oklahoma this week, speaking at the national convention of ecological engineers in Stillwater.  Yes, they are real engineers. It’s not a made-up name, like domestic engineer. In case you’re wondering, the difference between ecological engineers and traditional environmentalists is that ecological engineers develop solutions that work for both sides, not just one side.

Probably every farmer and rancher in the country would say they wish an ecological engineer was running the EPA instead of the environmentalist, Gina McCarthy. She ramrodded through the Waters of the U.S. rule, which is totally one-sided against agriculture as farmers see it. Administrator McCarthy, said the new rule “will not add to or expand the scope of waters historically protected” by the previous EPA rule. Which raises an obvious question: why spend taxpayers’ dollars preparing, lobbying, and arguing over a new rule if it doesn’t change anything.  Are farmers and ranchers riled up over nothing? They see the new rule as an attempt by the government to control all water, including farm ponds, ditches, drain tile, and dry gulches. Despite denials by the EPA, farmers think it should be called the “Lands of the U.S.” rule because the government wants to control what they can do on their land.

Historic quote by Will Rogers: (advice to speakers)

“Another Decoration Day [Memorial Day] has passed and Mr. Abraham Lincoln’s 300-word Gettysburg Address was not dethroned. I would try and imitate its brevity if nothing else… Yours for shorter and better speeches.” DT #268, May 31, 1927

Since the economy bottomed out about six years ago, the lingering question has been: Is it recovering?  The answer depends on who you ask.

President Obama would say, “Of course it’s recovering. I ended the recession, job growth is steady with unemployment approaching 5%, consumers have more money to spend because of Obamacare and lower gas prices, interest rates for buying a home are low, and the stock market is in record territory.”

Others in Washington, mainly Republicans, would counter, “It’s the worst recovery from an economic downturn since the Great Depression. Employment is stagnant, wages are stagnant, and consumers are not spending because they expect the economy to continue muddling along.”

So what’s your opinion? Yes, I know I’m the one that’s supposed to provide the answers, or at least an opinion. But whether the economy is good, or not so good, seems to depend on the individual. One man, or one woman, or one family.  You may say the economy is a bummer, and your neighbor may think it’s going full steam.

This week President Obama said the wealthy and highly paid folks are “Society’s Lottery Winners” and they should be happy to pay more taxes. That description did not sit well. One thing those men and women have in common is they did not become successful by playing the lottery. Maybe a dozen or so did. But usually it’s hard work, taking risks, a bright idea, determination, a persuasive personality, and other characteristics you all recognize. That is what allows them to take advantage of their opportunities to succeed.

Suppose a person with world class skill in one area expands that talent to become a syndicated newspaper columnist, movie star, radio commentator, and professional speaker. Does that make him one of “Society’s Lottery Winners?”

Historic quote by Will Rogers:

“(President) Roosevelt wants recovery to start at the bottom. In other words, by a system of high taxes, he wants business to help the little fellow to get started and get some work, and then pay business back by buying things when he’s at work. Business says, ‘Let everybody alone. Let business alone, and quit monkeying with us, and we’ll get everything going for you, and if we prosper, naturally the worker will prosper.’ That’s exactly what business says, and they’re justified from their angle in saying that. One wants recovery to start from the bottom, and the other wants it to start from the top. I don’t know which is right. I’ve never heard of anybody suggesting that they might start it in the middle, so I hereby make that suggestion. To start recovery halfway between the two, because it’s the middle class that does everything anyhow.” Radio, June 9, 1935

Are you getting excited about the 2016 Presidential election campaign? Well, neither is anyone else. Except maybe the candidates and a few commentators.

Regardless, with only 17 months to the election, the Democrats and Republicans have announced a schedule of debates. The Democrats will hold six, with the first one in Iowa in early September, at an undisclosed location. It’s undisclosed because they don’t want hordes of fans lining up weeks in advance. I propose they hold it in the showroom of a John Deere dealer in Dubuque, next to a gas station that sells ethanol and biodiesel. That’ll help get the farm vote.

The big question is, who will be onstage with Hillary Clinton?  It may be just her and a couple of empty chairs. Of course, the Democrats will round up someone to sit there, likely Bernie Sanders of Vermont. And maybe the Governor of Maryland, but I forget his name.

The Republicans say they will hold 9 debates. They’ll need 6 of ‘em just to introduce all the candidates. Their first debate will be in Cleveland in August. Because of expected high demand they will use the Browns football stadium. It holds 70,000, which should be enough seats… for the candidates. Spectators can bring lawn chairs and sit on the field.

I have an idea to help the Democrats draw some viewers. (Does anyone really want to watch 90 minutes of Mrs. Clinton not answering questions?)  I suggest they invite a couple of the Republicans to join their debate. How about Carly Fiorina, Dr. Carson and Donald Trump? They might get lost among all the Republicans, but up there with Clinton, those debates could outdraw the World Series. Might even stir up memories of Lincoln-Douglas.

In California, the water shortage is getting worse. The snowpack, what there was of it, has mostly melted. Do you remember that Gov. Brown ordered whole cities to reduce water use by 25 percent? Well, in the first month the reduction was only 4%, so he’s going to get serious. Swimming pools may only be refilled with water from the bathtub. The new status symbol in Hollywood is a brown lawn.

Whether the governor will reduce the water flowing freely to the ocean, I’ve got my doubts. Near as I can tell, that reduction has been zero percent.

Historic quote by Will Rogers:

          “Debates don’t settle nothing, but they are entertaining.” WA #637, March 10, 1935

I read in the New York Times that Russia hacked into some of President Obama’s emails. That’s not good. But it gives a sliver of hope to the Congressmen investigating Secretary Clinton’s emails that she deleted: maybe Putin has ‘em.

Democrats are predicting that Mrs. Clinton will raise $2.5 Billion for her campaign for president.  Actually they only need to raise half that much because it can be matched 50-50 by money collected by the Clinton Foundation.

A new book shook up the Clinton campaign. She has said nothing herself about the content of the book. That’s no surprise because since announcing for President she has said nothing about anything. She thinks it’ll blow over and nobody will remember it except a few Republicans.  Democrats figure if she says nothing till November 2016, she’s in.

Meanwhile the Koch Brothers are trying to decide which Republican candidate to support with a $1 Billion donation.  One of the potential candidates, Donald Trump, responded, “Is that all?”  Mr. Trump is ready to put in $2 Billion, but only if the candidate is named Trump.

With all this talk of billions for politics, there’s one group of folks that could use a modest donation: the newscasters and commentators that work for MSNBC. They have spent so much time on television insisting the wealthy should pay a bigger share in income taxes that they forgot to pay their own. Al Sharpton is the leader of the scofflaws, being $4 million in arrears. Three or four others owe thousands.  Don’t count on the Koch Brothers to bail them out, but Clinton might.

Historic quote by Will Rogers:

“The short memories of American voters is what keeps our politicians in office.” DT #1154, April 7, 1930

April 19 is a date that lives in a special kind of infamy because of deadly attacks by deranged kooks, including the one in Oklahoma City 20 years ago.  So far it seems we have gotten through another April 19 without any kind of terror attack on American soil.

I’m guessing our nation’s security forces were all on heightened alert today. If that wacky postman had delayed his mini-helicopter ride to the Capitol grounds until April 19, he would have been shot down for sure.

Hillary Clinton campaigned in Iowa last week. Iowa is where every candidate has to start, then on to New Hampshire and South Carolina. She stopped at a vocational school where about 50 reporters were waiting for her near the front door. But she had her van driven way around to a back door, with the reporters running wildly to get a glimpse of her before she disappeared inside. Another day she dined with a few hand-picked Iowans, but reporters were kept away.

She has been campaigning a week as the “champion for the middle class” but has avoided answering a single question about the middle class, or another other class. Other candidates were answering questions on the Sunday morning news programs, but not Hillary. So far the media are not complaining. She sent them an email that she will be in New Hampshire this week. So they are camped out in Manchester, waiting anxiously. Don’t be surprised if she avoids them completely and shows up in Myrtle Beach instead. You know, if she can successfully avoid media questions for another month, maybe they will simply avoid her.

Republicans are making fun of her Chevy van. Well, it won’t be long till at least a couple of the Republican candidates are campaigning in a bus. In Nashua, New Hampshire, Friday and Saturday, about 20 of ‘em gave speeches, one right after the other. Can you imagine sitting in the audience, having to endure 20 unique critiques of the Obama-Clinton administration.

What we want to hear, from all the candidates, is how to get the economy moving in high gear. It has been sputtering along, month after month. Oh, once in a while there is an optimistic report that things are getting better. Then the next month our hopes are dashed, with fewer new jobs and less spending by consumers.

I wrote last time about the California drought. City folks are complaining about having to cut back 25% while farmers don’t have to cut their water use at all. All the news articles say the farmers “use 80 percent of California water.” But they don’t, nowhere close to it. You might be surprised to learn that agriculture uses about 40%. Here’s the shocker: about 50% of all the water in California dams goes down the streams straight to the Pacific Ocean. Environmentalists insist on it. So, I suggest the city folks tell the governor to hold on to half of the half that’s currently “spilled” so they can take a bath as often as they need to for good hygiene.

Historic quote by Will Rogers:

          “I know part of the presidential candidates personally—well, I know about 18 or 19 of them. The others I know by reputation. So I am going to give you the real facts as I see them.” WA #76, May 25, 1924